I know that people move all the time, they move houses, suburbs, states and countries but I felt utterly unprepared for the emotional and physical exhaustion that came from leaving my home in Perth to find a new home in a small village north of Liverpool in the UK. The last week feels like a blur now. So many goodbyes and each one with their own special kind of anguish. Punishingly hard because I know that I am the one responsible for the pain of each of those wonderful people. It puts you in a strange position of being the cause of the pain and being unable to soothe it. Some kind of leaver’s guilt I suppose.
My parents emigrated a long time ago. They packed up their lives and moved to Australia leaving behind their entire family and all of their friends. They wanted a better life for their children and an inexpensive life in the sunshine by the sea held massive appeal and I can see why. Perth is a wonderful city and it’s improving all the time. It’s definitely not the sleepy town it once was but it retains some of that small town charm even as it grows and changes into a more culturally unique and vibrant city. My parents are supportive of my choice to move. They knew I had to find my own path and Mum always encouraged me to do what I had to do and I think I know despite the pain of missing everyone and feeling that gnawing guilt, that this is where I need to be right now.
My aim was to get out of my comfort zone but I do feel like I’ve kind of jumped into the void and my immediate reaction to that seems to be to find something familiar to cling to and my family here have been absolutely amazing in that respect. They have given up part of their home to me and have been so incredibly generous that I am continually bowled over by their kindness. I’ve definitely needed to nurse my wounds this week and they have given the space to do so and endless comfort. I am so indebted to them.
England is just as I remember but I feel like I am also seeing it with new eyes, as a resident rather than a tourist. It is very daunting trying to begin to navigate whole new systems, a new currency, different road signs and different processes for getting a job (apparently Resumés are called CVs here. Who knew?). It’s a whole new normal and I’m going to have to get used to it. I definitely never expected to have so much culture shock coming here. I know it will take time and I just hope so much that things work out. I know that through all this I’m going to have to take chances and really seize opportunities otherwise this whole thing will have been for nothing.
I’ll keep you posted.